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Read Part 1 here: An useful guide on how to talk to your child about sexual abuse (Part 1)
What can I do to protect my child?:
1. Be aware of WHO is around your children. It is very important to know who is around your children on a daily basis at things like a play date or a soccer practice, and for special occasions such as neighborhood parties or family gatherings. If a child's behavior changes after being around specific adults, take note.
2. Always check references of babysitters, counselors, etc. Many states have public registries that allow parents to screen individuals for prior criminal records and sex offenses. Once you have chosen the caregiver, drop in unexpectedly to see how your children are doing.
3. Pay attention to patterns you see in adults. Is an adult paying special attention to your child or taking an uncomfortable interest in what your child is doing? Take the time to talk to your children about this person and find out why the person is acting in this way.
4. Create circles of protection. Involve other parents or family members who are at after-school events or gatherings. Discuss the subject with them, creating circles of safe adults who will also watch out for children. You may also want to Invite your local law enforcement or child abuse prevention organization to a neighborhood discussion group to learn about the issue and to process people's emotions.
Signs of Sexual Abuse:
Child sexual abuse is difficult to detect because of the secrecy that surrounds it. However, children may indirectly disclose that they have been sexually abused through behavioral signs and indicators. Indicators may be physical, behavioral, or both. Signs and behaviors which may suggest sexual abuse is occurring include:
• Waking up during the night sweating, screaming or shaking with nightmares.
• Showing unusually aggressive behavior toward family members, friends, toys, and/or pets.
• Complaining of pain while urinating or having a bowel movement, or symptoms of infections such as offensive odors, discharge, or symptoms of a sexually transmitted disease.
• Having symptoms indicating evidence of physical traumas to the genital or anal area.
• Suddenly wetting the bed.
• Experiencing a loss of appetite or other eating problems, including unexplained gagging.
• Showing unusual fear of a certain place or location.
• Sudden frequent unexplained health problems.
• Engaging in persistent sexual play with friends, toys or pets.
• Having unexplained periods of panic, which may be flashbacks from the abuse.
• Regressing to behaviors too young for the stage of development they already achieved.
• Initiating sexual behaviors.
• Indicating a sudden reluctance to be alone with a certain person.
• Engaging in self-mutilations, such as sticking themselves with pins or cutting themselves.
• Withdrawing from previously enjoyable activities.
• Asking an unusual amount of questions about human sexuality.
If you suspect that a child has been sexually abused:
• Show that you understand and take seriously what the child is saying. Child and adolescent psychiatrists have found that children who are listened to and understood do much better than those who are not. The response to the disclosure of sexual abuse is critical to the child's ability to resolve and heal the trauma of sexual abuse.
• Assure the child that they did the right thing in telling. A child who is close to the abuser may feel guilty about revealing the secret. The child may feel frightened if the abuser has threatened to harm the child or other family members as punishment for telling the secret.
• Tell the child that he or she is not to blame for the sexual abuse. Most children in attempting to make sense out of the abuse will believe that somehow they caused it or may even view it as a form of punishment for imagined or real wrongdoings.
• Finally, offer the child protection, and promise that you will promptly take steps to see that the abuse stops.
Also read:
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